[Heather]

It is really hard to lose a cat or dog because thry can be so loving for do little. They don’t judge, they just accept and live in the moment, a really beautiful thing to see, really. I’m so sorry for your loss. Please give yourself time to grieve for your sweet companion before considering the drastic step of ending your own life. There are many cats out there who need a loving home and would give you a lot of laughs and tender moments.

I saw how fit you were as a professional dancer and can understand your deep disappointment. But you can take all that terrific knowledge and experience you have and funnel it into a new avenue of activity even if it is to just start a website where you offer fledgling dancers good advice. I was impressed with your website and thought if you can create that, you could easily create another that is on a positive topic.

As for your health, I would try acupuncture to at least reduce some of the pain you’re experiencing. I was a former competive swimmer from age 8-19, completely toned and limber. In my 40’s, I suddenly had severe low back pain trying everything…2 chiropractors, normal MRI, spine surgeon spent 10 minutes with me and said Sorry, there’s nothing I can do. I couldn’t drive easily, couldnit just sit long to even eat. It is frustrating to have pain and no solution, no answers. But just keep trying Peter.

For me, acupuncture reduced the severe pain by about 1/3. Then I went to a very experienced massage therapist who gave me stretching exercises to do which at least made driving better. Then I got back in the pool after 20 years of no workouts and slowly got myself into better shape with far less pain. (Hey, I recommend swimming to anyone too, even if it’s with the assistance of a kickboard or just wading).

I researched inguinal hernia surgeries over the past 3 months because my husband needs one and will soon go to The Hernia Center of Ohio. In my reading online, I discovered a retired hernia surgeon who offers free consultations by email – Dr. Kevin C. Petersen, M.D.

This retired surgeon has a lot to say about mesh and mesh pain. He removed mesh back when there was not a lot in medical literature on how to do it. He seems to understand the full spectrum of pain and could possibly steer you toward some help to at least reduce your pain. I would try him. His website is noinsurancesurgery.com

Again, I sympathize with you saying good bye to your cat. I’m crazy about Chesapeake Bay Retrievers…have planted trees for my Chessies who had to leave me. For me, the grief never leaves, it just lessens and evolves. Do think about getting another cat.. There’s a sweet one out there who’d love a life with you.

ChessieGirl