The mesh does not grow in to your existing tissue. Your body creates new tissue around the mesh fibers.
Somewhere around three to four weeks is considered the point at which the mesh has been enveloped enough by body tissue that it can’t easily be pulled free. But the body will continue to try to get back to its original “code” forever. At two months I think that most surgeons would consider your device fully “incorporated”. That is a misnomer, of course, since the mesh never becomes one with the body.
You’ve been talking to experts, I suggest asking them these questions directly. Do they see better results from early removal than late? Is there a certain length of time after which waiting is pointless? The patient will never get better? If they know the answer then they can help people get on with their lives when they have problems. It’s a difficult question because they, and we, all want to believe that the body will heal itself if given enough time. Often, I think, the reality is that the patient just accepts their new diminished life.
I was surprised in your other topic that Dr. Jacob was ready to remove your mesh right away. He is very active in the field. That is telling. He must know something, or he is just very confident in his abilities. Or he might have seen some flaws in the method or material used on you.
Good luck. Keep collecting information. Eventually an answer will come.