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Scare tactics by doctor
Hello All,
So I have had mesh removed about 3 months ago and the surgeon who removed it is a very cocky doctor who quickly got irritated when I made a list of questions to ask him before and after surgery. His character changed ever since the time I asked details about the surgery and how I didn’t feel comfortable when he did not show up at the operating room when they were getting ready to put me under. His demeanor towards me has been highly anxiety provoking and now I am scared to even talk to him. To me he is like a bully and I am at his mercy feeling helpless and defenseless. Mind you he was 6 hours late on day of surgery laughing like was normal. When I tell him that I continue to have pain and soreness he ignored my responses and on some he only responds with one word answers. Clearly he is being disrespectful to me. I have paid a good portion out of pocket to be treated this way. I still continue to have soreness and when I emailed him to request for an MRI script because it’s been almost 3 months, he responded again with a NO!
I just feel horrible and I don’t know what to do and feeling anxious by this type of response that I am getting from a doctor whom I trusted after so many years of having trauma from mesh. What are my rights as a patient and how should I address this matter? I am scared and don’t like confrontations but I am lost. Do I bring this up at my next follow up and be direct without worrying about any kind of mistreatment by the doctor? What would be the right words to tell how I feel since I am loss for words and feeling and shocked that a doctor can treat a patient this way like a bully with fear tactics. It’s bad enough we have to deal with so much crap, it’s worse when your doctor is mistreating you. Thank you. -
2 Replies
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Sorry you are having this interaction. I would be direct but respectful with your surgeon and see if you can get a bit more help. If not, be your own advocate and seek a second surgeon to help you.
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I am sorry you are experiencing ongoing pain after your umbilical mesh removal, and hope it resolves with time. That being said, based on your testimony, I would not quite characterize your doctor’s interactions as “scare tactics,” which imply some sort of implicit threat of some kind.
I would ask your doctor respectful but pointed questions the next time you visit. Make it concise, but say what you need to. Ultimately, you are unlikely to change a doctor’s demeanor, but perhaps you can learn his rationale. I read your previous posts. If you are, in fact, a medical student, tell the doctor. Maybe he’ll disclose a bit more at your next visit.
I’m guessing that it is common for lingering pain @ 3 months post op. Bear in mind also, insurance companies will commonly deny MRI coverage unless you’ve jumped through all of the hoops (alternate imaging like ultrasound, physical therapy, etc) so that may be factored into the equation as well. He may also be of the opinion that imaging is not necessary since he was just in there, surgically.
If it comes down to pain management, then inquire about cortisone or nerve blocks to help in the interim.
I hope that you can find the relief you need. Often, time is the best medicine. 3 months post op is still somewhat early. Take heart, and best of luck.
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